Sven and his Metaphorical Baseball Cap

At roughly 2.37 today I was left gasping by a particularly plucky Swede. Anyway, enough about my private life (guffaw!)

In other news it turns out Sven Goran Erikson is mental. After years of dedicated conservatism, Sven has come out with probably his most bizarre squad selection yet. But you know what? There’s part of me- that occasionally spontaneous part that doesn’t really understand mortgages- that is really rather pleased.

Bad Bits
1) No Wright-Phillips, even as a backup. Admittedly SWP has not had a great season, but how Sven can think Jenas is more of an attacking threat than him is beyond me.
2) No Bent as a backup. How the leading English Premiership goalscorer is ignored at the expense of Andrew Johnson is also beyond me.
3) Owen Hargreaves- Yup he can play in a number of positions, but can’t play particularly well in any of them.
4) Walcot- What the fuck?! Either a masterstroke or an absolute joke. If neither Rooney nor Owen are fit he will definitely play a part. Defoe and Bent must feel like fools.

Kind of Good Bits
1) No Ledley King- would have been a waste of a squad place, we have four world class centre backs, and he is not good enough in midfield to act as a stopper
2) Lennon- somewhat makes up for the emission of SWP and is a surprise package circa Owen in 98 and Rooney in 2004
3) Walcot ditto. And then some. Not only is he an unknown quantity on the world stage, but lets face it, none of us know what he’s like.
4) Carrick. Yup, but then why bother with Hargreaves too?

In conclusion, the squad is certainly radical, but then so was Michael Foot’s manifesto in 1983- the longest suicide note in history. Lets continue the political analogies. When William Hague wore a baseball cap to the Notting Hill carnival he was trying to prove that he was not boring and could be a bit of a card sometimes. He ended up looking like a twat.

Having consistently criticised Sven’s conservatism, however, I would seem like a bit of a twat if I accused him of being too radical. So I won’t. Tactically this squad is questionable, which also makes it a bit exciting. Like hedging your bets before an exam- you could fuck up but you could ace it. Well done Sven, and good luck.